Are you Wearing a Porcupine Suit?

 

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Interesting title huh? I bet you cannot wait for me to talk about his topic. I believe it effects many of us and may not realize it. Actually, I know it does from my years of coaching and helping people take off this painful figurative suit so they start feeling & giving love again.

  • Have you ever found yourself saying that no one pays enough attention to you? 
  • Do you want to feel more love in life? 
  • Have you ever felt defensive by nature? 
  • Do you find the most common theme in your words or thoughts are = criticism of people, places, or things? 
  • Are you Passive/Aggressive instead of being confidently assertive?

I am sure these are very tough questions to ask about our self and most people hate to admit this. I have been there too! When negative is brewing, we see the ‘bad’ in everyone and everything.

Now, ask yourself, how much fun is this for others to hang out with you?

  • How often do you put on your Rose colored glasses and truly appreciate the person you are discussing? 
  • Do you see the good in them? 
  •  If not, why not? 

I listened to James Ray’s monthly live call this past week and he talked about friends and family who are Energy Vampires. This is James’ terminology for negative people and their effect on us when they are draining us of our positive energy by their negativity. Very true! It happens more often than not and now with the Holidays people are worried about spending time with their families who may be = Energy Vampires.

If we are feeling unappreciated, unloved, negative, sad, irritated, or annoyed these are emotions that are draining YOU and the people you are hangin' with! The old saying goes here…. “ I will bite them, before they bite me”…what I mean by this is that people are defensive and judgmental when they are feeling insecure, doubtful, vulnerable, scared, and so on.

However, they will not see this or admit this..They are wearing their own, self-created Porcupine Suit! It will keep everyone away from them. It is a security blanket so no one gets close enough to hurt them… Hmm… pretty smart! However, no one can get close enough to hug you either…After all who wants to hug a porcupine…

$#%^*&*^Yikes = OUCH!

I remember a particular time in my life when I was still drinking and my party friends didn’t even want to hang out with me any longer. I couldn’t understand why? Until one day, someone bold enough told me…. Why would anyone want to hang out with you when all you do is complain how bad you have it? Now I had two choices... I could make excuses from the person telling me this, since it was exactly the road she was walking. I could walk away as the victim of her harsh words or I could take this info and learn from it. [She was right by the way!] My partying/using days I was only living 25% of life. Now...100%. Life is simply too short.

I chose the later and I was in Rehab a few months later. Obviously, I have never forgotten this moment. Now when I feel negative, fearful, worrisome, and judgmental. I do ask myself… Ok, Merna what is really going on! Yup, I look in the mirror not at others... I have to live with me. I want many, many verbal, emotional, and physical connections from people in life and I hope they will accept mine.

Let’s torch these stupid suits and get back to living! How do you do this? You start with looking in the mirror of self and ask yourself... How are you feeling? This will point you in the right direction and journal these thoughts. [Also, Pocket of Pearls]

If it is tougher than you realize, you can invest in a coach to take you to the next level ... Remember you are not alone!

Life is too short to walk around in this painful suit…Find your way starting today!

 
Copyright © 2008 Merna Throne. All rights reserved.




 
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